I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
