I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Randomize
