just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
I am never drinking with the goths again.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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