Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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