try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
