I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
