k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
