my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
I just fanned myself with my wet toothbrush to dry my mascara. Wtf
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize