Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
