Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Randomize
