I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
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