Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Well shit, I would've slept with him if I knew he was gonna be in the draft.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
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