Why did I call the Oregon Department of Transportation at 4:30 in the morning, and who did I talk to for three minutes?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
Randomize
