I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
A bitchslap is in order.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
