babies were throwing up all over the place
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize