So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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