Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." 🙄 🍞🍷
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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