Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Randomize
