plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Randomize
