ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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