South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
