woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Randomize
