Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I stole a fireplace last night.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
