ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
BRING THE BAGELS
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
