dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
I had to cum in my sink.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Randomize
