weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Is there a reason there's a dick print on my seventh-story window?
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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