my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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