He asked me if I "almost moaned"
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize