I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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