She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Randomize
