He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
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