I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
