found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My vagina is officially offended.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
