If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
the day after is always just damage control
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
You could have chosen coming to fuck me over getting too hammered to drive. But you made your bed, and now you get to jack off alone in it.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
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