Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
