I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
Randomize
