She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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