well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
