we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Although I'm glad you didn't let my climb in the sink, I really wish you would have let me pretend to be a duck in the shower for a little longer
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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