I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
