That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
Do you know who these girls are? They're baking a cake, making chicken enchiladas, and bringing me beer everytime I finish one.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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