I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
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