how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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