I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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