oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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