Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
Randomize