i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
