No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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