Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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