Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
