then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
