i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
